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Here Today
Broke Tomorrow An elderly couple was vacationing in
Vegas. Sam always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots. Seeing some on sale at
the Western Corral out on Boulder Highway, he buys them, and wears them back to the
Excalibur. He walks into their hotel room and
says to his wife, Notice anything different, Bessie? Bessie looks him over,
and replies, Nope. Sam says excitedly, Come on, Bessie, take a
good look. Notice anything different about me? Bessie looks again, Nope.
Frustrated, Sam storms off into the bathroom, undresses and then walks back into
the room completely naked except for his boots. Again, he asks, a little louder this
time, Notice anything DIFFERENT? Bessie looks up and says, Sam,
whats different? Its hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday,
itll be hanging down again tomorrow. Furious, Sam yells, AND DO
YOU KNOW WHY ITS HANGING DOWN, BESSIE? ITS HANGING DOWN BECAUSE
ITS LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!! To which Bessie replies, Shoulda
bought a hat, Sam....... Shoulda bought a hat. A while back, I went to the Grand-Opening of
the new ESPN-Zone restaurant. It occupies the space formerly occupied by the Motown
Café at the NewYork-NewYork Hotel-Casino. The dusty old hits of Diana Ross, Smokey
Robinson, and Marvin Gaye didnt prove to be popular enough. Perhaps Michael
Jordans return to basketball will be more triumphant and more popular than Motown
music of the 60s was. I used to eat there quite often. Thankfully it was
always on a comp. A few weeks ago, I also went to the Grand
Opening of the new bar/eatery called Coyote Ugly. It is styled after the movie of
the same name. It too is located in NYNY, and comes complete with waitresses who
dance on the bartops, have a New York Im too hip to be anything else than a
waitress, but Im wicked in bed attitude, and the junk-package décor
faithfully copies the movie. It seems that themes come and go. Some work, and some go down in flames. Perhaps $8
to $17 burgers have limited one-time only appeal for most tourists. Post 9-11-01, I can personally tell you that the Hard Rock Hotel
& Cafe is doing great, as is the Rainforest Café and the Harley-Davidson Café.
Planet Hollywood at Caesars Forum Shops and Gillys BBQ at the Frontier are also
doing reasonably well. Hunger-pang delirium must have got me to thinking that there is
a couple of themes that just shouldnt be tried, like Bob Dole's All-Nude Crab Shack. Still, some people are probably tempted to open places based
solely on a famous name, like Willie Nelson's Beard
Squeezin's or Jimmy Hoffas Ribs, Fingers n Ears. Hopefully
theyll never get the financing for a place called Regis' Philburgers or
Planet Oprah. Im pretty
sure that I wouldnt count myself as a customer to any of THOSE places, but this is
Vegas baby, so you never know. I tell you all of this, because I want to talk about how certain
craps methods or systems come into and out of vogue. Just like some restaurant
ideas, some of them are destined for failure before they are even tried. Sometimes a
person will post a method on a Discussion Forum or Craps Bulletin Board. The method
then receives a bit of attention, and a number of players go out and try it. On the
surface, that doesnt seem like a terrible thing, but in most cases it turns out to
be a disaster. One of those systems is where you try to hit every Place
number IN CORRECT ORDER starting at the 4 and moving through the 5, 6, 8, and 9 before
betting on, and hoping for the 10 to show up. Oh,
did I mention that the inventor tells you to parlay each win, and bet it on
the next Place number in line. The likelihood
of this approach working is 670,761 to 1, but the payoff is about 340 to 1. How do you like your chances? You could argue that it offers a good payoff for a small initial
bet. That is true. But your chances of hitting it are rare, and the payoff is
no where near equal to the risk. If you like the thrill of the big payoffs, then I
understand the attraction. But if that is the case, a nine-team sports parlay is of
equal risk and usually provides higher payoff value. Most of these get-rich-quick
systems that you play today, will leave you broke tomorrow. The one exception where it could
be a good gamble, is if a Precision-Shooter is throwing the dice. In that case, your
chances increase commensurately IF he happens to throw all of the required numbers in the
right order. And that is still a
pretty hefty order! Ill never forget a discussion that I had with a fellow
craps player I really respect as both a player and as a person. When he read my
Mad Professor's Playbook for the first time, he said, Gee, I thought you had some
secret formulas and tactics. I guess that I dont have too much more to learn
about betting methods after all. The methods that I use are conservative, and
time-proven. Keep in mind that this dice game
has been around in one form or another since the Romans centurions had their greedy eyes
on the riches of Constantinople. Its not too difficult to separate the
reasonable methods from the bet $3,353,805 in the hopes of winning $1,700
scheme. There
is no Holy Grail when it comes to betting. Sure there are some methods and
approaches that are certainly better than others, but there are a lot out there that are
completely hair-brained and they pose serious threats to the integrity of your bankroll. If you combine a conservative betting approach with
Precision-Shooting, you have a decent chance. If you dont, the wild
fluctuations of your bankroll will usually swing to the negative side too often.
When that happens, even your rare winning sessions will not overcome the losses that you
experienced during the losing ones. Stick to making consistent
money. If you want to shoot for the moon, then buy some lottery tickets, but
definitely keep your day job. Good Luck & Good Skill at the Tables
and in
Life. The Mad Professor
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